Should I Be Worried if My Kid Is the Child Who Hits

By clrzclrsvqbifoif_calmuser | November 24, 2025 | 2 min read

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As a parent of a child with neurodevelopmental differences, I’ve encountered many questions about how to support my little one’s unique needs. One concern that often comes up is when it seems like your child might be the one who hits others. So, should you be worried if your kid is the child who hits?

First, let’s acknowledge that hitting – whether physically or metaphorically – can be a sign of a child’s struggles to regulate their nervous system and manage overwhelming emotions. This behavior is often not about being mean-spirited, but rather about trying to cope with feelings of frustration, anxiety, or overwhelm.

For children with neurodevelopmental differences, like autism, ADHD, or sensory processing disorder, the brain can have difficulty filtering out distractions, processing sensory information, and managing emotional responses. This can lead to impulsive behaviors like hitting or physical aggression.

However, it’s essential to remember that this behavior is not a reflection of your child’s character or worth as a person. Hitting is often a symptom of underlying difficulties with self-regulation and social communication.

Rather than focusing on what’s wrong with your child, let’s talk about what you can do to support their development and well-being. Here are some practical strategies to help your child manage their nervous system and reduce hitting behaviors:

1 Create a safe space for your child to express themselves: Provide a designated area where your child feels comfortable expressing their emotions and needs without fear of judgment or punishment.
2 Encourage emotional regulation techniques: Teach your child breathing exercises, deep pressure, or other self-soothing strategies to help regulate their nervous system.
3 Model healthy communication skills: Show your child how to express feelings and needs in a clear and respectful manner.
4 Offer choices and involve your child in problem-solving: Allow your child to make decisions about playtime, activities, or daily routines. This can help them feel more in control and reduce frustration.
5 Practice patience and empathy: When your child hits, try not to scold or punish them. Instead, acknowledge their feelings and offer a gentle apology. Help your child develop self-awareness by labeling and validating their emotions.

It’s also crucial to recognize that hitting is not the only challenging behavior children with neurodevelopmental differences may exhibit. They might struggle with initiating social interactions, maintaining eye contact, or understanding nonverbal cues. By being aware of these potential challenges and adapting your parenting approach accordingly, you can create a more supportive environment for your child’s growth.

As a parent, it’s natural to worry when we see our child struggling. But instead of worrying about what might go wrong, try focusing on what you can do to support their unique needs. By offering a safe, understanding, and empathetic space, you can help your child develop essential skills for social communication, emotional regulation, and self-awareness.

Remember, every child is different, and there’s no one-size-fits-all approach to supporting neurodivergent children. Be patient with yourself and your child as you navigate this journey together. With time, love, and support, your child can learn to manage their nervous system, develop healthy communication skills, and thrive in a world that may not always understand or accommodate their needs.

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